How to Manage Your Child in the Morning Without Tears

manage you child in the morning

Mornings can be tough. How do you manage your child in the morning?

Time is running out and you have to get the children off to school and yourself off to work.

Sometimes it all seems just too much.

Things are not where they should be, the milk’s gone off, the shoes need washing – let alone cleaning, and your child is grumpy and sleepy and unhelpful.

It’s so easy to snap at the child. It’s so easy to plonk a bowl of cereal down and leave them to it while you get on with 101 things that need doing. It’s so easy to forget that this is the start of your little one’s day – and a bad start will stay with them – and you, too. If you manage your child in the morning successfully you will both start the day well.

But a little organisation and self-awareness will change all that. Your day can start off well and you and your child will be happier for it.

Morning and Evening- Being Yourself

Some of us are morning types and others are just not. Knowing yourself will help you to organise things the way you want them to go. My father was a morning person – and every single morning I would be awaked by the smell of burnt toast. He never failed! That was signal to get up quickly before he turned the radio news on – which I didn’t want to hear. It got me out of bed – fast!

Whether you are a morning or an evening person, having a little special time to yourself before the hurly-burly of the day is worth getting up for. It gives you a few precious moments of peace.  This can make it easier to get up yourself as it is a pleasant start to the day. It gives you time to adjust your own body rhythm to that of your child.

Whatever you do in the morning it’s best not to act in haste. Many successful people have a small mantra they can say to themselves when things are starting to get out of hand. Something like, “I really do love him and if I count to 10… I will find a way to deal with this in a way that helps us both, 1,2, (grit your teeth)…10”.

Enough Sleep and Enough Time

Remember how you feel when you are not getting enough sleep? Grumpy. irritable and unlovable? I guess your child feels the same and so many children do not get enough sleep. I know the books say they all need at least 10 hours in childhood. But despite that, I personally have found that whereas the little boy can fall asleep in his supper the little girl never sleeps – she just goes to “Help Father Christmas”. We are all different, but if getting up is hard then it’s most likely that that child needs more sleep – or at least rest in bed.

Well, if you agree that we all need different amounts of sleep, then it follows that there is little more infuriating than having to lie in bed because it’s not time to get up.  But there is nothing worse than having to get up when sleep is calling you. This is where your skills as a mother come into play you know your child better than any old book. If she seems tired then she needs more sleep.

A Little Warning

And she still needs to get up early enough to wake up and meet the day. There are various ways to manage your child in the morning more easily but for many of us, a little warning is all we need.

A few minutes before it is time to rise open the door let in a little light – natural if possible or a daylight bulb. Let the child hear life around them – the adult cleaning their teeth, the dishwasher being emptied, the cars on the street or the birds singing. This helps to orientate them to the world about them.

And it’s best not to wake them at the last possible moment so that they have to rush through the essential activities. That creates stress for you and for your child.

Waking Up to Greet the Day the Happy Way

There are many ways to make waking up and getting up pleasant. And once up, usually we feel fine. It’s just the actual labour of getting out of bed, often into a cold room and the little chores that must be done which puts us off. And which puts our children off. So, it’s a good idea to limit these basic chores to just three things – clean teeth, dress and have breakfast. All else can be fun – time to enjoy each others company.

Waking to daylight helps our natural inborn cycle to wake us up. Let the first things he hears be pleasant, “I love you,” rather than, “get up, you lazy creature”. Some of us like to hear pleasant music in the mornings – find out what your child might like – and be warned – it may not be what you would have chosen!

Cold Comfort

A cold room is a put-off. If you can adjust your thermostat for say from 65 to 68 degrees Fahrenheit (18 to 20 degrees Centigrade) for a few minutes before they get up – that will help. Also having their clothes warmed is a nice touch. Who wants to climb into a cold pair of trousers first thing in the morning?

The smell of breakfast can be a quick getter-upper – and the toast does not have to be burnt!

Many kids like a funny alarm. I hate them, but your children might be different.

For myself, I always try to go to sleep thinking of a treat.  A small treat to get up to, a new shower gel, a quick walk with the dog or a tasty cereal that I have not tried before. Can you think of something to entice your children out of bed?

 The Two Keys to a Lazy Start to the Day – Even When You Have Little Time


Preparation and routine are the two keys to a happy and relaxed in the morning.

Have a routine. Kids like routine and it will ensure the essentials are taken care of.

It starts the night before –what can you prepare in advance?

Here is a list of some of the things you might need – you can make our own list – and stick with it! All these can be prepared the previous evening.

  • Pack lunches ready in the fridge
  • Gym, letters etc in the school bag with homework (and your bag packed as well)!
  • Clothes set out
  • Breakfast sorted
  • Car keys in the right place
  • Shoes by the door ready to put on – if they need the mud removed – do it the night before!

And in The Morning?

This will leave you with the minimum to actually do in the morning

  •  Clean teeth
  •  Breakfast
  • Dress

That’s all – anything else is a treat!

Anxiety About School

Sometimes reluctance to get to can be due to anxiety about the day ahead. Too many children are anxious about school. How did you feel before your driving test? This is an issue which needs to be dealt with – but not when you are running for the bus. Tell your child that you will talk about it after school and keep your promise. Bullying is a sad and pervading part of life – and you need to deal with it.

Above all reassures them that you love them and will look out for them. They need your respect, your confidence in them and your love (even when you feel frazzled and stressed).

Mornings can be Fun

Time is running out and you have to get the children off to school and yourself off to work.

But you still have time to enjoy their company in the morning – for a little while at least.

There is not much to do – things are where they should be, and you are both awake – or at least fairly awake. The bags are packed, the lunches made, and shoes are ready to march out of the door.

You can sit down with your little one and relax over the snap, crackle and pop. Everything that has to be done is done. It’s a pleasant way to start the day. And a good start to the little one’s day – will stay with them – and you, too.

How relaxed you can feel knowing that you and your child are ready for the rest of the day – no tears, no grumbles – just a happy smiling face across the table. When you manage your child in the morning with simple routines then all goes well. What a wonderful start to the day.


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